Negotiation, Communication & Body Language Tactics To Upgrade Your Life & Relationships, With Former FBI Negotiator Chris Voss.
Ben Greenfield
Feb 24, 2024
Mindsip insights from this episode:
Be present during calls to enhance focus and engagement
During Zoom or phone calls, multitasking can kill your focus. Being fully present, whether by looking at the camera or walking while talking, helps you absorb more and be more engaged in the conversation.
Clarify communication by asking instead of guessing body language
Reading body language can be tricky and often leads to wrong assumptions. Instead of guessing, try asking or labeling what you notice (like 'You seem upset'), which clears up misunderstandings and strengthens communication.
Master listening to transform relationships
Truly listening to others—making them feel heard—can accelerate trust and improve any relationship, whether personal or professional. Most people don’t listen well, but mastering this simple skill can transform your interactions.
Use mirroring and labeling to foster connection
Repeating a few of someone’s words (mirroring) or naming their feelings (labeling) are powerful tools for making people feel understood. These easy techniques can be used anywhere—from negotiations to making small talk or strengthening family bonds.
Frame questions to empower 'no' for positive outcomes
People feel safer and more in control when they say 'no,' especially when tired or stressed. Framing questions so someone can comfortably say 'no' can actually help move conversations and decisions forward in a positive way.
Multitask with sauna and podcasts for health and recovery
Chris Voss, the negotiation expert, enjoys listening to podcasts like Huberman Lab and Lex Fridman while in the sauna or meditating. He uses this time not just for learning but also for health and recovery, showing how multitasking routines can benefit both mind and body.
Walk during calls to enhance cognitive performance
Taking phone calls or meetings while walking can actually help you process information better. The gentle movement of walking supports clearer thinking, making it a smart biohack for better focus and cognitive performance.
Stay coachable and embrace lifelong learning for health optimization
Chris Voss attributes his success to being coachable and working hard. He stresses the importance of lifelong learning and always being open to new ideas, which is key for anyone looking to continually optimize their health and life.
Enhance mental wellness through physical health and gratitude practices
Voss points out that physical well-being is linked to mental hygiene. Activities like working out and practicing gratitude help keep your mind positive, which is essential for success in both communication and life.
Maintain positivity to boost intelligence by 31%
You’re actually 31% smarter when you’re in a positive mood. Smiling, having a positive tone, and staying upbeat can make you and those around you think more clearly and creatively.
Prioritize collaboration for long-term success and trust
Long-term success and trust come from being collaborative rather than manipulative. Voss and his clients have found that working together leads to better results than trying to 'win' every interaction.
Practice tactical empathy to build trust and break barriers
Tactical empathy means understanding and acknowledging the other person’s feelings and views, even if you don’t agree. It’s about being fearless in facing their perspective, which can quickly build trust and break down barriers.
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