"We Learn It Too Late!" - Don't Argue or Fight With A Narcissist, Do This Instead... | Dr. Ramani
Rangan Chatterjee
Aug 21, 2024
Mindsip insights from this episode:
Embrace plan B to prevent self-sabotage
To avoid self-sabotage from being overly invested in one outcome, you must 'fall in love with your plan B' and even have a crush on plans C and D.
Recognize lasting effects of narcissistic abuse on trust and discernment
Narcissistic abuse permanently changes a person, and you don't ever come back wholly, instead becoming more discerning and less trusting.
Address emotional abuse to prevent negative health outcomes
Emotional abuse in childhood is a guaranteed predictor of negative adult physical health outcomes, addiction, and mental illness.
Recognize vulnerability in happy families to avoid narcissistic relationships
People from very happy families are vulnerable to getting stuck in narcissistic relationships because their optimistic bias makes them believe love can solve everything.
Break negative thought loops with simple sensory exercise
For those overwhelmed by meditation, a simple sensory exercise of naming five things you see and four things you hear can effectively break you out of negative thought loops.
Overcome perfectionism to initiate health-promoting behaviors
Perfectionism is a form of self-sabotage that can prevent you from starting health-promoting behaviors, like running, because you get stuck researching the 'perfect' gear instead of just starting.
Seek validation from friends before sharing news with toxic individuals
If you can't leave a toxic relationship, take good news and bad news to supportive friends first to get validation before sharing it with the narcissistic person.
Recognize narcissism as an evolutionary advantage in social hierarchies
Citing Dr. Robert Sapolsky's primate research, the speaker explains that narcissism has always been evolutionarily adaptive, with human 'alphas' historically being narcissists at the top of the hierarchy.
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