Why Love Feels So Hard — And How to Finally Feel Safe in Your Relationships (with Jillian Turecki)

Mark Hyman

Nov 26, 2025

Episode description

When relationships feel chaotic, it’s usually not just about the moment—it’s old patterns running the show. In this episode of The Dr. Hyman Show, I talk with Jillian Turecki, relationship expert and bestselling author of It Begins With YOU, about why love can feel so hard and how to finally feel safe. Jillian opens up about her own heartbreak, loss, and transformation, and shares what she’s learned about healing old wounds and building relationships that feel secure, balanced, and real. Watch our full conversation on YouTube or listen wherever you get your podcasts.

We discuss:

• How to regulate your emotions and stay connected during conflict

• The difference between past wounds and present triggers

• Science-backed tools you can use to build emotional safety and trust

• Why generosity, curiosity, and respect create lasting intimacy

• How to choose a healthy partner and stop repeating old patterns

Lasting love gets easier when you calm your body, challenge old stories, practice repair, and try to choose wisely from the start.

View Show Notes From This Episode

Get Free Weekly Health Tips from Dr. Hyman

https://drhyman.com/pages/picks?utm_campaign=shownotes&utm_medium=banner&utm_source=podcast

https://drhyman.com/pages/longevity?utm_campaign=shownotes&utm_medium=banner&utm_source=podcast

Join the 10-Day Detox to Reset Your Health

https://drhyman.com/pages/10-day-detox

Join the Hyman Hive for Expert Support and Real Results

https://drhyman.com/pages/hyman-hive

This episode is brought to you by Seed, BON CHARGE, Function Health, Sunlighten, Timeline and Paleovalley.

Visit seed.com/hyman and use code 20HYMAN for 20% off your first month of Seed's DS-01® Daily Synbiotic. This holiday season get 25% off until December 31st. Head to boncharge.com to receive this offer today! Join today at FunctionHealth.com/Mark and use code MARK2026 to get $50 OFF toward your membership. Head over to sunlighten.com and save up to $1400 or more this holiday season with code HYMAN. Support essential mitochondrial he

Mindsip insights from this episode:

Stop viewing your partner as an enemy to improve conflict resolution

The most important key to self-regulation in a conflict is to stop the internal story that is making your partner the enemy.

#healing

#recovery

#regulation

#relationships

Confront fear of inadequacy to enhance relationships

The fear that underlies all problems in relationships is that you are not good enough and will therefore be deprived of love.

#fear

#prebiotics

#probiotics

#relationships

Utilize advanced probiotic for comprehensive gut health

Seed's DSO1 daily symbiotic uses a patented capsule-in-capsule design to deliver 24 probiotic strains and a prebiotic to the colon for benefits beyond digestion.

#gut

#infrared

#probiotics

#recovery

Apply 'one crazy person' rule to de-escalate conflict

To de-escalate conflict, a useful rule is that only one person can be 'crazy' or emotionally hijacked at a time, while the other must remain calm and listen.

#conflict

#regulation

#relationships

#trauma

Regain control to alleviate true suffering

True suffering comes from the feeling of being completely out of control and unable to change your circumstances.

#control

#fear

#relationships

#suffering

Distinguish lust from love to strengthen relationships

We are culturally conditioned by society and media to believe that lust is love, but they are two very different things, and this misunderstanding causes many relationships to fail.

#calmness

#conflict

#culture

#relationships

Move beyond heartbreak to fulfill your life

Being stuck in heartbreak for years often means you are stuck in the story of what happened and that other areas of your life are unfulfilling.

#fulfillment

#mitochondria

#relationships

#supplement

Utilize infrared PEMF mat for inflammation reduction and muscle relief

The Bon Charge Infrared PEMF mat combines two therapies, infrared heat and PEMF, to reduce inflammation, stimulate cellular repair, and relieve deep muscle tension.